My Views on Marriage and Cohabitation

I was asked to give my views on the following questions which were posted to me by a friend doing his Master Degree programme on Psychology.

1) We have seen how we ourselves, our parents and our friends live together in a marriage. What are your views about marriage?

Born to a traditional Chinese family under the sway of the Confucian culture, I regard marriage and keeping the family unit intact as the duty of the husband and the father. In those days, a few decades ago, a broken marriage was regarded a disgrace to the family concerned. In the olden days, even though marriages were match-made, the husband and wife would try to maintain and sustain their marriage until they depart from this world.

Fifty years ago, the term cohabitation was alien and unheard of. At that time the worst   failing a daughter could bring disgrace to the family, was her elopement with her loved one. Now, elopement has become an obsolete term which can only be found in the dictionary and in the classical novels of the orient and the occident.

 2) Some couples prefer to stay together without marrying or what is called "cohabitation". What are your views about "cohabitation"?

 

"Cohabitation" has become a common trend of the present day whereby couples prefer to stay together for their own convenience as well as for companionship as both men and women are mutually economically independent. If they can get on well with each other by cohabitation they will stay together for a longer period or maybe indefinitely. If not they would  break off their relationship instantly and permanently without any legal binding constraints so that each one is free to  get attached to a new partner or each could remain single with no obligation or commitment to the former one.

"Cohabitation" is common nowadays especially with the rapid urbanization and the advancement of IT social network, like Facebook and many other networks; with more and more youngsters looking for jobs in urban cities across the boundary of states and nations where they could easily get acquainted and socialise with others.

3) If given a choice will you cohabitate or to allow your children to cohabitate?

"Cohabitation” is prohibited from the religious point of view as it is forbidden in Christianity and is also prohibited in one of the Five Precepts of Buddhism as most religions do not encourage premarital sex.

As a Buddhist I should not cohabitate and I would not like to see my children cohabitate as well. But as my children are already adults, I cannot stop them from doing so if they choose to.

I believe if the children were to have a strong religious inclination, they would not be tempted to cohabitation unless the perspective of religions has changed over the dimension of space and time.